POST ‘ER TEASE.

a pick six

by Hunter Jon

I guess because of the internet movie posters don’t nearly serve the purpose they once did. They used to be the focal point of every marketing campaign. I imagine now they are a sliver of the distribution pie. One could even argue that above all the current purpose of a poster is to give websites and streaming services a profile picture for any given movie. But the idea of it providing necessary information such as who’s in the movie, who made it, what it’s about and when it comes out is no more. And if that’s indeed the case then all the more unnecessary is the teaser poster. I’m not sure when the idea of multiple posters for a single movie came into vogue, but when I was growing up most event pictures had a teaser poster. Now they have never ending teaser, character, banner and alternate Mondo-style posters. But back in the day you just got one tease and then the real thing. So you had to make each of them count. This may sound archaic but teaser posters were often the actual announcement of a movie. Unless you read Variety or kept a very close eye on the industry you wouldn’t know a movie was even in production until that first poster showed up on the wall of your local cinema. Or in a magazine or the newspaper. This is hardly the case these days. I think we can agree the good ol’ teaser poster has kind of gone by the wayside. But boy do I have fond memories of them. I actually think their apex was in my teen years. Sure, big budget movies still provide them. But most of the time those are fan service more than anything. They rarely provide any new information. It’s just cool to catch of glimpse of some superhero’s sequel suit and to see the title’s final font and/or logo. However, there was a time when teaser posters were a much bigger deal for many different reasons, a few of which I’ll cover as we take a look at my six favourites.

(I’ve included the appropriate amount of honourable mentions)

He was making a western. We didn’t know much, but we knew that. And the title. And that despite that title it wasn’t a “Django” remake or sequel. And we knew the basic plot and cast and stuff. Ok, maybe we knew a lot - but seeing this poster set it all in stone. It was happening. Officially. Hopes were high and this teaser made them climb even higher. It set the stage wonderfully. A simple visual that tells the story so well that a title isn’t even needed. Instead we get what has become a brand name - Tarantino. Like Hitchcock and Spielberg before him you can now sell a movie with just the man’s last name. If I remember correctly this design actually began as fan art that someone made after the movie was announced. Everyone, including Quentin, loved it so much they reached out to the artist and turned it into the official poster. The broken chain imagery would go on to become a logo of sorts for the movie.

All those late nights of watching fan-made trailers on YouTube, fantasizing about just how awesome a solo movie could be. The endless possibilities and potential. You’ve got a built-in blockbuster vehicle for one of the most famous and talented people on the planet - and she’s dying to do it. Why has this not happened? It was kind of infuriating, to be honest. They hinted that something was maybe, sort of, possibly, kinda in the works for about a decade. And even though we knew it was finally happening months before this posters release, it was still very emotional and exciting to finally get such solid visual confirmation. What a wonderful visual it was, too. Her symbol. Big, bold and bright. Studio logo on top, release date on the bottom. That’s all we needed. You could see this poster from across the street and know what it signified. And of course there she is, looking fierce and ready. Now they just need to release the damn thing.

This list wouldn’t feel complete without it. Because it might be the most iconic, memorable teaser poster of all time. It set the standard. In fact, maybe this right here popularized the very concept. Talk about a picture being worth a thousand words, or even just speaking for itself. I honestly think that had more people loved (or simply enjoyed) the actual movie this poster would be beyond beloved. But sadly, it’s a bit of a downer. It not only reminds you of something you didn’t like, it very specifically takes you back to a moment in your life that was filled with hope, promise, and you had something you were looking forward to more than anything you had before - something you never dreamed wouldn’t deliver. So seeing this poster is a bit like seeing a photo of an ex or simply a happier time in your life. It’s bitter-sweet but mostly bitter. But a brilliant poster, none the less.

I started to see it in magazines and comic books - a simple image that caused a lot of excitement. Not only did it mean I’d get to see a Batman movie on the big screen for the first time, but I would get to do so for my Birthday, which fell during the week of it’s release. For a while I didn’t even know the actual title because this poster doesn’t feature it. But it didn’t matter. I of course knew that symbol and certainly knew what a question mark wrapped around it signified. Every time I see this one I’m hit with a wave of nostalgia.

For me, this poster was a huge deal for three very distinct reasons. Let’s go bottom to top. One - the title. Since it we’ve had everything from “Man of Steel” to “Dark Phoenix”, but you have to remember this was the first ever superhero movie not to have the hero’s name in the title. Calling it just “The Dark Knight” was pretty brave. Not to mention a risky financial gamble. I was absolutely sure they’d get cold feet and change it to “Batman: The Dark Knight” by the time the marketing campaign kicked off. So when they released this poster I was a little shocked, a lot delighted and thoroughly impressed. And that simple, small, stark font. That was kind of fresh and bold, as well. Two - had anyone ever used a red bat symbol as the Joker’s smile before? I’d certainly never seen it done. It seemed so obvious yet so brilliant. Plus, the public hadn’t gotten a full, official look at Ledger’s Joker yet, so this was a wonderfully effective tease. A way of hinting toward his look without using a single image of him. And they were true to their poster. He did indeed have black circles around his eyes, a permanent wide red smile and a white face - all painted on. A very clever design that is still remembered fondly over a decade later. Three - that tagline. Just like that the Joker had a new chilling catch phrase which, thank god, he ended up saying a handful of times in the movie itself.

This is a rare recent instance of a poster actually revealing something about the movie that we didn’t know prior. We knew Bo Peep would return, but my jaw nearly dropped when they put this out and she looked like she does. Her staff now a weapon. Her skirt now a cape. Her heroine stance. I could not have been happier or more excited. Sheriff Woody is perhaps my favourite character ever, so naturally I’ve always been fond of his love interest. I understood why she was left out of the third movie but definitely wanted better closure than that “Yeah, even - even Bo…” line we got. But never in my wildest dreams would she pull a Sarah Connor and return as a warrior. And again, like most of my picks here, we’re given nothing else but a release date - the absence of a setting with a bare, muted colour tone background is daring for marketing aimed mostly at kids. Her and her empowering transformation was more than enough and they wisely knew it. I want this on my wall.

This one means a lot to me because it hung next to my bed for about a decade. An original print - straight from the theatre wall to mine. This was the game-changing superhero spectacle of my youth that followed in the footsteps of Batman ’89 and Superman ’78. He’d been done in live-action before, but always on the cheap and dripping with cheese. This was Spider-Man finally on the budget he deserved and they made sure the first teaser poster showed that off. Perfectly composed. He looked slick and modern, as did the font, yet they smartly didn’t mess around with his costume. This was the look we all wanted and they nailed it. You shouldn’t be able to convey as much emotion in a motionless, masked face but somehow they did. It was the dawn of the 21st century and a trust worthy old friend was going to guide us through a new kind of blockbuster.

I’m cheating here because I’m now certain this poster never existed. This one I’ve featured seems to have been made available for purchase in the years since the movie’s release. The official poster used at the time had the title front and centre. But for whatever reason that’s not the way I remember it. I picture this on bus stops and magazine pages and movie theatre walls with no title. Zero text, in fact. Just the whimsical shot of the boats approaching Hogwarts. For a kid who loved the book(s) and was the exact right age to be taken on this magical journey, seeing this poster was too good to be true. There it was, the wizarding world brought to life… and I’d be there any minute. Forget them coming soon to you - this posters aim was to make you believe that you would soon arrive in their fantastical world. Perhaps I’ve forced myself to remember it with no title because this inviting scene is ten times more enchanting without it. Even being able to clearly spot Hagrid in the lead boat blew my mind. I can’t think of a better teaser poster. The only reason it doesn’t take my top spot is because it only really exists in my memory.

My mum was paying for popcorn and candy and things so like any kid I immediately wondered off to explore. That’s when I saw it in the distance on a wall. It was like a scene out of a movie as I slowly approached it. Surrounding sounds fell silent. The rest of the world faded into darkness and the only remaining light was shining down on this poster in front of me. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I grew up loving the animated TV movie more than almost anything. One Christmas my mum even got me a framed, certified animation cell from it. It remains one of my most prized possessions. And at nine years old when you see this poster you don’t think - “Well, that’s never going to come close to capturing the magic of the original and therefore is nothing but an unnecessary cash grab. And I cringe to think how they’re going to pad the perfect-as-it-is short story to make something feature length.” No. You think - “They’re… making… a live-action… Grinch movie… and Jim Carrey… is playing him? Why this is going to be the greatest movie ever made!” And, I mean, c’mon - it’s a pretty perfect poster design. A furry green monster’s hand dangling a broken red bulb - the perfect symbol of a ruined Christmas. What else could those two things mean? They didn’t even need to include a title with such iconic imagery brought to life (they did anyway… just to be safe). That’s what it was all about, by the way. Seeing him brought to life, even if it was just his hand - the ultimate tease. It was all too much for me. And the moment I saw it for the first time remains the greatest movie poster memory I have.