PINHEAD SOLD

SEPARATELY.

by Hunter Jon

With due respect to all others, I consider there to be six major slasher franchises that lead the way. Each features a killer so iconic that even those who haven’t seen a single installment would probably recognize them. Perhaps even be able to name them. They’re the A-Team of the genre. And although their first outings are often considered their best, that’s not always the case when it comes to my personal preferences.

So here are my favourite installments in each franchise that stars one of the big six baddies. I’ve rated each out of four stars.

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: DREAM WARRIORS (1987) ***

Beyond its great set-up, I’m not really a fan of 1. I think even less of 2. But this works for me in every way possible. Bringing Nancy back as a psychiatrist totally works. The setting, premise and eventual execution all work. And letting Freddy have some fun certainly works. They bite off a ton here, stylistically and narratively, yet never choke - unlike everything after this, which fell over and died if you ask me. The special effects are still impressive as hell and the authentic examination of an ensemble of mentally ill teenagers only gets more meaningful with age. Watching those who survive transform into ‘warriors’ is moving and empowering. Plus, the soundtrack, both score and title track, rock. It’s everything I could ask for in a “Nightmare”.

SCREAM (1996) **1/2

You have to remember, this wasn’t a case of tongue-in-cheek, it was tongue-through-cheek. That had never actually been done before. And it was done just well enough. Certainly memorably enough. So when you hit the ground with something that fresh, it stands to reason anything that follows is gonna come up stale. And that’s exactly what the sequels are to me - incredibly so. (For the record, I find 4 most tolerable) They also painted themselves into one too many corners by sticking with the whole who-is-the-killer climax, which is destined to do nothing but disappoint. Who knows what the future has in store, but as of writing this, 1 easily wins in my book.

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VI: JASON LIVES (1986) ***

The first is what it is: a great set piece with a memorable twist ending followed by a killer jump scare. Using those as a jumping off point, we got four more. Other than the evolution of Jason himself, I find these have very little to offer that we didn’t get the first time around. Then, suddenly, one with an actual personality comes along and makes it all worthwhile. And I’m not just talking about the fact that it’s humorously irreverent and self-aware. I’m talking about liking and therefore caring about the victims for once. I’m talking about a surprisingly investing romance. I’m talking about kids actually being at Crystal Lake for the first time. I’m talking about actual tension. Yes, there are plenty of gags, but take a step back and you’ll see that the bigger picture wisely takes its mythology seriously and does its best to honour it. It’s fan-service heavy before the term even existed. I think most of this is thanks to director Tom McLoughlin, who also holds sole writing credit here. He really had a clean vision for this and it shows. For once there was only one cook in the kitchen and he knew exactly what to serve up.

HALLOWEEN (1978) ***1/2

Initially, this was merely about doing “Black Christmas” over again on a different holiday. Except they did so with the skill of Hitchcock, causing an unprecedented success. But sometimes simplicity reigns supreme. Often, in fact. And that success led to a kind of slasher soap opera that got super dense, which, while kinda fun to follow and figure out, mostly bogs things way down. Here, though, you’ve got something sublime and so much of that has to do with how simple it all is. Masterfully crafted, yes - every frame. But still so simple. Which is all encompassed in The Shape himself, from mask to manner. I don’t have to go into any more detail about why it’s the series highlight - you already know why. I will, however, thank Debra Hill. Thanks, Debra.

CHILD’S PLAY (1988) ***

CHILD’S PLAY 2 (1990) ***

It’s a TIE, folks. Very different movies, yet I enjoy both equally. Perhaps that’s why, actually - because of the differences in tone and plot. The second isn’t trying to succeed where the first did and that’s why it succeeds. The only thing that carries over are characters and quality, causing an irresistible consistency. And first you get Catherine Hicks as the most kick-ass mom ever, then you’re treated to Christine Elise as the most kick-ass foster sister ever. I can’t watch 1 without watching 2. Maybe that says it all right there. Anyone else would have just given the doll to another kid, but Mancini knew exactly where to take things and, evidently, still does. Alex and Chucky’s relationship will always be the core and heart of this series. Don knows that and used it to thread the needle so well between these two that they nearly work best as one - one that hasn’t been matched. Although “Bride” and “Curse” come close, in my opinion.

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (1974) ***

You can’t match this atmosphere. It just feels like it’s happening in front of you. It’s hard to comprehend that this was a ‘production’ of any kind, complete with a crew, call times, craft service, etc. It’s that visceral. That scary. That real. It succeeds on a ‘convincing the audience’ level that is usually reserved for found footage. And then on top of all that it has a hell of a lot to say about the American dream, the working class, and, most importantly, family. I don’t get any of that from the sequels, remakes, or prequels... (ok, to be fair, ‘2’ is plenty about family). It’s that rare beauty: absolute chaos handled with expert care. Hooper not daring to recapture its spirit with the sequel is a testament to how special, and untouchable, it is.